He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Randomize
