I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
