Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
