No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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