we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
