Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
