We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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