They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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