you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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