Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He better not be in your backpack
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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