I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
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