Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
