i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
