I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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