me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize