I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
