Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize