Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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