Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
im drinking this country out of the recession.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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