I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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