I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
YAS. BRING CRAB.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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