plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
is wine microwaveable?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize