We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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