Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Randomize
