you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize