Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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