I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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