I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
