Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
