what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
