Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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