Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
