You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
