So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
