Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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