I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize