i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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