those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
