Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
