I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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