So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
