Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
