She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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