They should really pass out barf bags in church
Did you just see the Batmobile???
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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