I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
