Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Randomize
