Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(239): View more from Florida

Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'

(1-603): View more from New Hampshire

that's awkward

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(612): View more from Minnesota

hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.

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(740): View more from Ohio

he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.

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(443): View more from Maryland

Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.

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(210): View more from Texas

I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.

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(301): View more from Maryland

someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed

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