she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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