So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Randomize
