Just mADE A PArabola og urine
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize
